Evolving Thoughts

No chance in Hell of a Catholic education

Proving, contrary to the father’s comments in the story, that it really is the dark ages, an Australian Catholic Church school has banned (and since rescinded) a child whose surname is “Hell”. In German, “hell” means “light” or “bright”.

Mr Hell, of Austrian heritage, says the name means light or bright in German.

“It’s 2007, not 1407, it’s not the Dark Ages,” he said.

The dark ages is much earlier than that, usually running from around 500CE to 1000CE. The 15th century was the time of the rebirth of classical learning with the translation of Aristotle’s works and many Arabic works of scholarship into Latin.

Late addition: Siris notes that there is even a justly famous Jesuit astronomer named Hell. How wonderful.

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Comments (11)

  2. “The school is working with the family in the best interests of the child.”

    *spitface* What impudence!!

  3. Do you think that they also check if names happen to have a meaning in Aramaic or Hebrew?

  4. So an alternative to “brights” could be “hellions”? Has a good ring to it.

  5. So an alternative to “brights” could be “hellions”? Has a good ring to it.

  6. There is a Hell in Norway, I believe, and I have a Finnish friend who delights in the name Helstadt. And yesterday I arrived back at the airport in Vantaa, called, err, HEL.
    I think we’re damned up here. But at least we’re use to HEL freezing over.
    Bob

  7. There is a Hell in Norway, I believe, and I have a Finnish friend who delights in the name Helstadt. And yesterday I arrived back at the airport in Vantaa, called, err, HEL.
    I think we’re damned up here. But at least we’re use to HEL freezing over.
    Bob

  8. Slightly off-topic, but still amusing, let’s not forget about Climax, Michigan and Intercourse, Pennsylvania.
    I’ve always wanted to stop in Intercourse and bring home a church program that says ‘Welcome to the First bla bla bla Church of Intercourse.”
    Or maybe the pope guy could establish a SEMINary there.

  9. There’s also such a thing as prudence.
    The basic principle of Roman law, which has (in many cases sadly) been inherited in Catholic disciplinary practice) that says “If you cause disorder, you’re dead.” It isn’t a question of right or wrong, but of social cohesion.
    Note that this has nothing to do with official Catholic teaching but the adminstrative practice of many priests and nuns. It is often a cause of problems for conservatives and traditionalists, since we usually get ostracized for “causing division.”
    In any case, imagine a classroom where a student’s name was “Hell,” particularly a private school where teachers regularly use last names. Everytime the teacher called on the kids, the other kids would snicker and make jokes.
    I’m not saying the school is doing the right thing (although there is an official Catholic teaching that people cannot have names that are profane); just that it’s not about “living in the dark ages.”

  10. If it is true, this is a very clear case of Germanophobia and Anglocentrism. It is very sad that a “Catholic school” (Catholic means “Universal” in Greek language) display such a great deal of ignorance. Perhaps Australian Christians (Protestant and Catholic) are convinced that God himself wrote the Bible in English through King James and thus Hell can only be interpreted in the English meaning of the term. Another possibility is that the boy has not been admitted to the school because Hell in German means Bright, and this b-world has been used by non-theists (see http://www.the-brights.net/)

  11. If it is true, this is a very clear case of Germanophobia and Anglocentrism. It is very sad that a “Catholic school” (Catholic means “Universal” in Greek language) display such a great deal of ignorance. Perhaps Australian Christians (Protestant and Catholic) are convinced that God himself wrote the Bible in English through King James and thus Hell can only be interpreted in the English meaning of the term. Another possibility is that the boy has not been admitted to the school because Hell in German means Bright, and this b-world has been used by non-theists (see http://www.the-brights.net/)

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